Do you have cats? If so, you might be surprised to hear that you can do some pretty heavy magick with cat poop! That and calling upon the ancient goddess of discord…
I had a friend who was having all kinds of grief with a lodger. He wasn’t paying rent, he was disrespecting her place, he was rolling in drunk as a skunk, that kind of thing. On top of that, he had some on/off woman who had been disrespectful to her too.
So I gave my friend a spell to sort out both of them.
I was at her house, and she was going through her fridge getting rid of what I call “kill you food”, you know, the stuff that’s practically walking out to the garbage by itself.
Anyway, she found a Tupperware box with some prehistoric looking chicken in it that the woman had given him. Yep, he’s that much of a scumbag that he goes scrounging food even though he doesn’t need to. My friend also has two beautiful cats, who produce not so beautiful poop, and I had an idea… So I said to her, “Get your poop scoop, we’re going to do some magick.”
I got her to add some prime specimens from the litter tray to the box of chicken, then spit on it with all the anger she could muster. Then I got her to replace the lid and give it a really good shake so it all mixed together well.
While she was doing that, I got her to say the following, directed at the guy and his low-rent woman:
“Just as you have caused so much sh*t in my Life, may both of your lives be turned to sh*t too. I call upon Eris [Ancient Greek goddess of chaos, strife and discord] to bring turmoil into your lives, and I humbly thank you, mighty discordian goddess, for your help.”
When she felt she had poured all of her angst into the working, she tossed it into the trash, knowing that the garbage truck would give it thorough destruction.
It might be an unconventional spell, but as long as it gets the job done, that’s fine by me. And do you know what? Within a few days, an eviction letter she’d given him that had been refused for about six months was suddenly magically accepted, so she’s finally going to get him out of her hair.
Who knows, maybe he’ll move in with the other on/off woman and they can give each other as much grief as they want, that would seem to be quite a just outcome to me.
Writer and purveyor of the magickal arts.